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How to Properly Deal with Criticism

Most of us see criticisms almost always in the negative perspective. Whether it is dishing it out or receiving one, we almost always take it as a way of sort of ruining our other game plan. Criticisms such as those thrown by Simon Cowell, a judge in the famous celebrity search American Idol, is an example of how criticisms are thrown nowadays. It is a scathing criticism to make contestants cry and the audience to pity on them. It is as if he relishes on finding faults in the contestant's imperfection. Though at one point or another, I see his point, however it was given heartlessly, thus making him a real antagonist.

But what is really criticism? According to Dr. Bruce Weinstein, the goal of criticisms is to help someone be the best that they can be. Thus, when it is done appropriately, the person who has been criticized certainly ponder on his activities and check on it and change it, or at least improve for the better. So how should we give criticism? I believe that criticism should be preceded by encouragement. It must not be personal but rather it should have the support of a personal relationship.

In order to prevent insult, a person should carefully pinpoint specific actions or ideas to criticize. A person usually can accept negative feedback of their performance, but they usually irked and react in a rather furious way when their person is being attacked. Hence, a person can effectively deliver constructive criticism after they have taken time to acquaint themselves to the person he or she will criticize. Without the relation connection, the person receiving criticism may feel that the other person has a personal vendetta against them.

On the other hand, how should we receive criticism? Usually the more successful, popular or important a person is the more tendencies that he or she will receive a guaranteed criticism. Thus, a person who is on the prime of his life should distinguish those criticisms that are aimed to destroy and those criticisms that would help in building their career and personality.

In my years of being a well observer, I believe that the following are the tests in distinguishing a criticism, to wit: firstly, does the criticism have basis in fact? Secondly, is the criticism offered in a way that its aim is to help me out? And lastly, is the person giving the criticism has the insight and perspective to speak credibly? When all the above-mentioned questions are answered in the affirmative, then I believe that the person should take the criticism seriously and ponder as well as weigh its meaning. However, if any of those questions was answered in the negative, then the person can let it go in one ear and out in the other.

Sincere criticism, indeed, rarely comes without a morsel of truth. I believe, the trick to stay sane is just to be open when confronted with negative feedbacks. When criticized, a person usually reacts defensively, furious and at one point, hurt. But those people who gain something out of hard words and criticisms control their emotions and opt not use their tongue but rather listen and remain objective, increasingly become more aware of themselves and thus, improving their own craft and personality.

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